Evendays

When speaking of the influence of false brothers and their sway on the Corinthian church, Paul quoted the O.T.:

Do not be deceived: Bad company ruins good morals.

In Christian friendship, we are not only loyal to each other, but we are also committed to holiness. As Tippens writes in his book, Pilgrim Heart, there is honor among thieves but that type of loyalty does not necessarily bring the friend any closer to God.
Even Jesus said to the 12:

You are my friends if you do what I command you (John 15.14).

We are put into a spiritual family in order to grow into the head, that is, Jesus. He is the goal of our friendship. In fact, Tippens writes: "Authentic spirituality is corporate by nature." In community there is accountability, there is mutual encouragement and there is the practice of good works.

This opens, of course, another question: Are my friendships opening me up to greater Christ-likeness? Friends are powerful.
In Malcolm Gladwell’s book, The Tipping Point, there is a chapter or two on smoking and youth. One of the interesting things is his claim that, according to certain studies, parents have little say in their kids attitude to cigarettes. Who plays, by far, the biggest influence? Peers. Most likely, if we want a good idea of the spiritual direction our kids are taking, we should look at their peers. Perhaps we should look carefully at our own friendships.

Just one more thing: About 30 years ago Flavel Yeakley (what a name) did some studies about growing churches and he found that the more friends new members had in the church, the less likely they were to drop out. In fact, if there were 7 friends in the church, they always stayed (unless they moved, etc.). But if they had but one or two friends, they almost always fell away.

Sure, friends are loyal. But for the Christian, loyalty is not the defining characteristic of friendship. The real question always is: Is this relationship ultimately bringing one of us closer to God?